My dear Father God, The Bible tells us to trust in you and not to lean on our own understanding.. that is so much easier to say than to do. When I find myself having doubts, yes and sometimes fears, I open my heart to you and know you will fill me with your love to chase away all those fears and doubts.
Once upon a time I berated myself for having doubts. This morning during my meditation a thought came to me... I DO trust you God, it's me I don't trust.. but then I am not supposed to. God in one of my studies years ago I read that having doubts is not sin. That doubts allow You to prove your love and provide us with more faith. I had to learn to not feel guilty for doubting.
Jesus, my beloved Savior, how amazing it must have been for those living in your time on earth. OH how I wish sometimes that I could have been one of those women who worshipped and served you. I know you told Thomas that we who 'have not seen but still believe' will be so much more blessed because of it. I am so grateful, Lord, that you love me so much. I totally depend on it. This morning I read of how you must have wished you could have been in more than one place at a time while here on earth. And how through your death and resurrection, and sending The Holy Spirit into our hearts, you are now able to be everywhere we need you to be. How amazing is that? I can totally relate, dear Lord, as sometimes I wish I could be in more than one place at a time.
I LOVE living in Pensacola. I am so blessed with many friends here, the Blue Wahoos, the Blue Angels.. etc. etc. My amazing church family and the wonderful memories I have here of my beloved Oscar and our marriage. What a true blessing that was for me.
But sometimes I wish I could be closer to my family. Or at least had the ability to visit with them more... or at all! I struggle with finding a means to repair my vehicle so I can go more places.
God, please be with my wonderful family, with my amazing, caring and loving friends, and touch them with your healing hand. Touch me also God. Help me and my doctors to figure out why I am not feeling as well as we think I should. Keep me in your protective hands until I can see the doctors I need to see and get all the tests I need to have done. You have created our earthly bodies in a marvelous way, but after 76 years mine has worn out. IF you are not ready for me to come home, please help me to be healthy enough to enjoy the life you bless me with. I can handle a little pain Lord, pain lets me know I am truly alive.
Thank you so much for answering my prayers!! Several of my friends have received your healing touch. Many of my friends do know your love through me and that is such a blessing to me.
I am praying for a few who do not know you personally and in hopes that you can reach them.
Help me to live my life in such a way that everyone sees your love, mercy and blessings..
In Jesus name, Amen